The "Real" Christmas card

Yes, I sent out a traditional Christmas card with my children looking angelic, clean and sweet.  But every year I like to make a second Christmas card; a card that shows who they really are...and it is usually my favorite.
This is the "real" card for Christmas 2014

                 

 

The Holiday Boutique

Katie's elementary school has a holiday boutique every year so that the children can buy presents for whomever they wish.   Katie gets very excited at the prospect of shopping for gifts, and was greatly looking forward to this year's boutique.  As the date approached, I asked her , "What are you going to buy at the Holiday Boutique on Friday?"  She asked, "For who?"  I said, "Well, how about for Dad?"  Seeming like she knew exactly what she was going to purchase, she stated, " Something with #1 Dad on it."  Then I said , "How about James?" 
Again, with a matter of fact tone, she said, "Something with #1 brother on it." I then asked, "What about Danny?" She looked at me with a sly smile, paused and said, "Hmmmm....#2 brother?"  Then she laughed and laughed.  (12/9/15)

The Logic of a Teenager

Looking out the window at the wind driven snow at the beginning of a big storm,  Danny announced, " I'm going to run around the block without my jacket in the blizzard. " 
It was intensely cold; a bone-chilling  day, and I couldn't imagine why anyone would want to venture outside at all, let alone without a coat.  The only response I could muster was "Why?"
With a matter of fact, logical tone, he said, "Well, for one, when I get back I will appreciate how warm our house is."   I couldn't argue with that.   (1/26/15)

Glasses No More

     
     When James reached his 12th birthday, he no longer needed to wear glasses.   This fact seemed to excite Danny more than anyone.  Upon hearing the news,  he said, " Wow!  That's awesome that James doesn't need glasses anymore.  Mom, isn't that AWESOME?!"
I was surprised at his enthusiasm being that it was totally out of character for Danny to show interest in an event that didn't directly affect him.   I replied, "Really? Why?  What difference does it make?"
He stated, " Whenever I would jump on James to attack him,  he'd  say, 'Hold on...let me take off my glasses' and then he'd run away.  Now when I do it, he'll have no excuse."  (2/11/15)

Great Minds...

As I was getting ready to start dinner, I saw Danny opening the snack cabinet.  I told him , "Don't eat anything, I'm about to cook dinner."  He said, "I'm not.  I'm putting the pretzels back because I saw that you were."  I said, "See?  We think alike!"  He said with a sigh, "We don't think alike, Mom.  For starters, I like President Nixon and you don't."
(12/4/14)

The Outgoing Message

James and I were sitting together talking when the home phone began ringing.  Knowing that besides my mother, only telemarketers called the land line, I let the answering machine pick up.  Upon hearing the outgoing message, James said to me, "Mom, did you ever notice that the voice on the machine sounds a lot like yours?  That's so weird."
I said, "James, that is my voice.  I recorded the message on the machine. "
He said, "Ooooooh, I thought the message came with the machine.  I always thought the voice was familiar, but I didn't think that you could record it yourself."  I  then said, "Didn't you notice that the message says ' You've reached the Brennan family' ?"  He said, "Yeah, I thought that was even weirder than the machine sounding like your voice."  (10/25/14)

The iPod Songs

When Danny first started showing an interest in music, he came to me asking for some song suggestions for his iPod.  Being that Tom knows very little music outside of the Classic Rock genre, specifically the "Lynard Skynard" station on Pandora, I felt that Danny made the wise choice in enlisting my help.  He said, "Mom, do you have any hip hop or rap music that I could put on my iPod?" 
I searched the music data base in my head, examined my iPod for some possible candidates, and came up with some classic, fun hip hop songs that I thought he'd enjoy.  I took his iPod and uploaded the clean versions of "Without Me" by Eminem, "Bust a Move" by Young MC, "Just a Friend" by Biz Markie, "Girls" by the Beastie Boys, among others.  
Later that evening, I asked him, "How did you like the songs I put on for you?"
He replied in a less than enthusiastic way,  "They were okay."
"Okay?! Wow, I'm surprised because I thought those songs would be perfect for you."
 "Well, I liked the song Dad put on my iPod much better than the ones you put on.  His rap song was really good."
Unable to imagine Tom knowing any rap song, let alone one he already owned,  I asked with shock, "Dad put a rap song on your iPod?!  What song was it?",   
Danny replied, "White and Nerdy by Weird Al Yankovic".